Life and Work with Carrie Stevens

Thanks for sharing your story with us Carrie. So, let’s start at the beginning and we can move on from there.
I am a Substance Abuse Prevention Specialist in the Plano Independent School District. Since I was a little girl, helping others has been a passion of mine. I grew up in Plano, Texas and attended schools in PISD from kindergarten through 12th grade. My mother and father were both educators and were always my biggest support system. I am truly blessed to have amazing, caring family and friends in my life.

During my junior year of high school, I completed the “what do you want to be when you grow up” questionnaire. The results came back relating to a helping profession and I continued my journey into social work at the University of Texas at Austin. I graduated with my Bachelor’s and Masters in Social Work and became a Licensed Mastered Social Worker (LMSW). Growing up in Plano, I was somewhat sheltered and my mom always said I wanted to help the “underdog.” I wanted things to be fair for everyone. I would question why I was born so fortunate and I knew how grateful I was to have loving, supportive, parents who valued my opinions and provided a safe, secure environment in which I thrived. During undergraduate and graduate school, I learned so much about abuse, neglect, trauma, addiction and the long-term effects. Although I knew not everyone has the same opportunities, I was even more grateful for my trauma-free childhood. This knowledge, needless to say, was very eye opening and made me question many things and want to do more to help others in need. I moved to California after graduate school, where I got my first job as a social worker at a Children’s Ranch for abused and neglected children ages 6-12. Gaining experience in working with children who had experienced so much pain and suffering in their young lives was traumatizing for me, as well. I had to toughen up and know that building a trusting relationship with these kids was the only way to reach them. I had to set firmer boundaries as I found myself constantly worrying and stressing over my work. I moved back to Texas and started a job as a social worker in several elementary schools in east Plano.  My social work knowledge allowed me to utilize so many skills from resource linkage including finding beds, clothes and food for many of the families with whom I worked. I drove a school van and loved taking the students home from after school tutorials because their parents did not have transportation. Several local agencies in the area offered money for snacks for the students at no or low cost. My motivation grew as I observed the power of building relationships.  By simply showing up and asking a child how he/she was doing and finding out what he/she cared about was making a positive difference in the lives of these children! I wanted to provide opportunities for all children regardless of their income. Mad Science, an after school science program, was a huge hit and I am grateful for many donors who paid for students who typically would not have access to attend such a program.

One of my favorite roles as a social worker was a part-time position I had with Jewish Family Service in Dallas. I was fortunate to help develop and facilitate a program entitled Weaving Webs of Womanhood. A grant allowed us to go into several at-risk elementary schools in Dallas where mothers and their daughters attended eight weekly sessions in the evening.  Positive communication, mother/daughter bonding, healthy boundaries, relationships and family history were several goals of the program. We had such great feedback and it was so fun strengthening the bond between mothers and daughters!

Several years later, I became a Substance Abuse Prevention Specialist in the high schools, which I currently continue to do. I absolutely love my job! I also have a passion for working out and I love sharing that with others. Exercising daily helps my stress levels and my friends and family know I do my best to make it a priority. A couple of years ago, I had a group of students and their moms attend six boxing classes at a local boxing gym in Plano. My goal was to teach them how important it was to keep their bodies healthy; not just mentally, but physically. They learned about eating right, finding healthy alternatives to anger and/or drug/alcohol use, and feeling good about their choices. Sadly, some of the girls had experienced trauma and/or abuse at some point in their lives. Boxing was an outlet to express anger in a healthy way, taught self-defense and raised their confidence. I am truly blessed to be able to plant seeds with the students I encounter on a daily basis. I have two children of my own and I hope I am showing them the importance of kindness and helping others. We all are dealt one hand of cards and we must play them wisely, some choices have dire consequences. My students will tell you my favorite quote is “This too shall pass”, because good and bad things pass. You never know how far your smile, kind word, or just asking someone how they are, will go.

Has it been a smooth road?
Overall, I feel so fortunate with what life has thrown my way. I cannot thank my own family enough including my two sisters who are also in the education field. My parents instilled not only the importance of education, but also the importance of helping others along the way. There were times I knew I would not make as much money as my friends who had business degrees, but I did not mind. Making sure I take care of my own self is a struggle of mine and many in the helping profession. We give a lot and sometimes forget to give to ourselves. I make sure I workout daily to help with my own stresses and some of the sadness I deal with at my job. I want to set a good example for my students and my own children. Working with teenage girls keeps me in touch with the latest trends, current drugs, social media, etc. I think it is a different world for women today. Dating violence is a topic near and dear to my heart, as well. I have had a wonderful life and I try to share my joy and positive attitude with others, especially the young men and women I get to educate on a daily basis. During my adult life, I found myself in an unhealthy relationship. As a counselor, you don’t think it will happen to you. I never thought I would be in the situation I ended up in and I am so thankful it all ended with everyone safe. My passion runs deep for educating and developing awareness about dating violence and domestic violence. Another saying I have on repeat which I learned from a very wise friend is “We teach people how to treat us”. If we allow controlling, abusive behavior, it will likely continue. I love watching young women help and support each other, as well. I feel so blessed for being able to work with students and to know they actually come to my office and bring their friends to me asking to listen or help them with their problems. I want young women to know their worth. It is so important in relationships, jobs, everyday life and their mental well health. Reminding students, both boys and girls, to identify their feelings and learning healthy coping skills is critical.

We’d love to hear more about your work and what you are currently focused on. What else should we know?
I asked some of my students what I am good at or known for and these are the responses I received, “You listen”, “You understand”, “You give me hope”, “You keep it real”, “Easiest older adult to talk to” hahaha! My fav. “People trust you”,” You help people with their problems”. What sets me apart is that I do my best to provide a safe, secure place for students to come and talk or just sit. Many of my students do not have the best home life so coming to school is the best part of their day. Sometimes I am the first adult they see and I always want them to know someone cares. My main struggles are watching the students I work with try to navigate life with social media and all the pressures thrown at them on a daily basis. Depression and anxiety are both rising at alarming rates. Teaching my students and parents healthy coping skills is a vital part of my job.

I feel I am also good at finding resources for the students, families and staff with whom I work. Food pantries in the area are a great help for many of the students who need food and toiletries. Drug/Alcohol treatment centers and counseling agencies are also critical resources for education/awareness and help for my students. Helping students with basic social skills and communication skills is also something I teach. Many issues my students face is fighting with parents, siblings or peers. Learning to listen and actually see another point of view is a vital life skill.  We were all teenagers at one time and the ego is alive and well during this time of life. Teaching my students and parents healthy coping skills is a vital part of my job. I see so many young girls struggle with self-esteem and anxiety or depression and they self-medicate with drugs, alcohol, self-harming, etc. I am constantly telling them if you see something, say something. This message goes beyond their classroom and the school building, anywhere in life, listen to your gut; we know when something just seems off. PISD is a wonderful district that provides so many resources for students and families beyond their educational needs. We look at each person as a whole, which includes mental, physical, and educational needs. My goal is for them to be successful and feel good about their choices and the path they choose in life.

Are there any apps, books, podcasts or other resources that you’ve benefited from using?
My favorite book is Maybe You Should Talk to Someone. It is an excellent raw read about a therapist and how she navigates her professional and personal needs.