We’re looking forward to introducing you to Stacey Lundquist MA, LCPC, NCC, CCTP. Check out our conversation below.
Hi Stacey, thank you so much for taking time out of your busy day to share your story, experiences and insights with our readers. Let’s jump right in with an interesting one: Have you stood up for someone when it cost you something?
I am currently working on my Ph.D. and, in my very first class, the professor was talking very fast, and we were all a bit lost. My cohort asked a question, but she started out with “this may be a dumb question but…” The professor jumped on her and said, “stop trying to throw out a net before you ask your question!” Jenn started to cry so I unmuted and asked to speak. The professor agreed and I said, “If you look around at this screen, I think everyone in this class feels like they need a net right now.”
Well, I got two emails after that. Both my professor and my cohort wanted to talk to me. The professor wanted to know why I said what I did and I started out on shaky ground with him.
But my now friend (cohort) asked to call me. She told me that no one, not even her husband, had stood up for her the way that I did, and she would never forget it. I may have lost some ground in that quantitative research class, but I would do it again in a heartbeat.
Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
Why in the world would you walk away from a 33-year broadcasting career? It’s a valid question but my life now answers it. I am now a counselor/educator with a schedule that is mine to build. My stress level has decreased greatly (along with my salary) and it is totally worth it. I will be 63 years old when I finish my Ph. D. and that is the next question I get from everyone, “why now?” It’s simple. I will turn 63 with or without that degree and I would rather it be with that degree. I want my life to be a living legacy for the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th generations that you are never too old, and you are never restricted. You can achieve anything you put your mind to and that is what I hope to inspire. I loved radio but having a full-time job, a counseling practice and getting your Ph. D. was just too much. I stood up and said no more and now I am living my best life with my best guy and my best two little dogs.
Okay, so here’s a deep one: What did you believe about yourself as a child that you no longer believe?
I was a “chubby” kid. My grandmother’s answer to every wrong in this world was “let me make you something to eat” and I lived by that mantra. I could not eat like other kids and be thin, so I was bullied endlessly. So much so that my so-called best friends in middle school gave me the nickname O. B. Whippo. You may be able to see it now but I could not back then so I put it on t-shirts, notebooks, walls; everywhere that you may put a nickname that people you care about give you. Of course, it stands for One Big White Hippo. When their abuse got to a certain level, I told them I did not want to be friend anymore and they drew on my bedroom window in egg “O. B. Whippo.” I will never forget that moment seeing them outside that window laughing and pointing.
Now I pick up a picture of myself in middle school and high school, and I realize that I was never fat. There is one pic of me in a bikini on a class trip and I shake my head every time I see it. There was nothing overweight about me but every diet I was forced to go on, every lie I was told revolved around my weight. So, now, I do not believe that I am fat but the size I am supposed to be. And I choose not to compare myself to others.
Is there something you miss that no one else knows about?
I was blessed to grow up a couple of blocks from my maternal grandparents. They had a swing in their backyard, and I used to sit out there for hours. I created entire worlds with my imagination on that swing and became the heroine in all of them. Once in a while, my grandfather would come and sit with me to share a moment before he went off to his workshop. We would chat and I would share with him what my dreams were. He would always tell me that I could do whatever I chose to do.
The swing and my grandfather are long gone but, in my mind, it is still my safe place. Using meditation, I can place myself back on that swing and wait for him to come around the corner of the house with that big smile. We sit and swing and then I will ask him, in my mind, “how do you think I am doing?” Sometimes he answers and sometimes he doesn’t, but he always shows up. And I almost always cry.
So, I miss the swing, I miss my grandfather, but I do get to visit with him when the world becomes too much.
Next, maybe we can discuss some of your foundational philosophies and views? What would your closest friends say really matters to you?
Not to sound like Barbara Streisand but my friends would say “people.” I collect people (in a good way) and that has been my life goal for a long time. Have you ever thought about how strange it is to meet someone, decide that you like that person and decide that you can do things together? Friendship is everything to me.
My oldest (she hates when I say that) friend is from college and we were in the same pledge class for our sorority. She sat down in front of me and I said, “Hi! My name is Stacey.” She smiled and said, “my name is Ann.” I looked at her funny and she looked surprised. I said, “No, you don’t look like an Ann. Do you have any other name?” Ann hesitated then said, “My middle name is Blair.” From that point forward, she was Blair.
The second oldest of my friends (30+ years of friendship) decided we could be friends when I asked her what size shoe she wore. Turns out they were bigger than mine (10) so we became friends to this day.
So, yes, my closest friends would say that people really matter to me.
Before we go, we’d love to hear your thoughts on some longer-run, legacy type questions. What do you think people will most misunderstand about your legacy?
In our society, getting ahead of everyone else seems to be the main goal in life. Many years ago, I decided that I had had enough of striving and started mentoring.
I was a great striver for that time believe me. I would not hesitate to step on someone if they had a position I wanted. And that worked for a while. I moved around the country from market to market, taking and taking whatever I saw.
But I got to the point where once I got there, it was never enough. The path left a string of people who to this day do not believe I have changed. If I had gone through what they went through working with me, I probably would not believe it either.
For the past ten years, I began to lift people up. If I was to receive something, I wanted to share it with as many people as possible. So, I started caring. I took Gen Z and started reverse mentorship. They are my legacy, not everything that I achieved. How they impact the world will be what I leave behind for the 2nd, 3rd and 4th generation. The world will never understand that.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.safeharborbc.com/counselors/stacey-lundquist/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thestaceystone/
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/staceystonesafeharbor/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/StaceyStone123
