Today we’d like to introduce you to Benjamin McElroy.
Hi Benjamin, so excited to have you on the platform. So before we get into questions about your work-life, maybe you can bring our readers up to speed on your story and how you got to where you are today?
Well…I am a theatre kid. I have been since birth. The doctors told my parents, “I’m so sorry your son is going to be clinically annoying for his entire life. It’s terminal”. But in all seriousness, I found theatre in elementary school, and it became my passion. My love of theatre was mirrored by my love of reading. I own over 500 plays. Although my scripts are always in the hands of friends I lend them to. My bookshelf only currently has 456 volumes sitting in her. I also adore fantasy. Which lead me to The Falcon Quinn series of books written by Jennifer Finney Boylan. Now, a large part of my story is one I hardly tell but is important to note with the trajectory of who I am. I had (or rather still have ) Major depressive disorder. Not only that, I am medication resistant to most antidepressants (and I have tried many). In 2021, I was given three options by a doctor. ETC, TMS, or Ketamine (not the way I pictured being offered Ketamine for the first time). I chose TMS, which essentially uses magnets to stimulate your brain and wake up your neurons. It worked. It worked really well. It made me feel like an actual human being again. But also a little terrified. Suddenly, I was in tune with my emotions, but I didn’t exactly know how to deal with all of them. It’s like I just woke up at 21. I was Voila, shipwrecked in a strange land. Still, I persisted and found myself again. And I dove headfirst back into creative endeavors. In 2020, when we are all in purgatory, I reached out to the author of the book series “Falcon Quinn” and asked “Hey could I adapt this into a play?” and she replied, “sure”. (More or less). Although that script is now in purgatory itself it served as a great connector with me to many other avenues. It had a workshop production with Plague Mask Players in 2021 (A company I adore, full of people I aspire to be as generous, thoughtful, and creative as). As well as introducing me to some friends that have remained in my life and hopefully always will (Hi Will! Hi Eduardo! Hi Cody!!). For the next few years, playwrighting took a backseat to my other ventures. I graduated from college at SFA in 2022 (Axe’em Jacks) and moved back home, where I worked at Outcry Theatre and also the Frisco Discovery Center. I taught classes and acted where I could (oddly enough all the acting work I landed involved me getting undressed to some degree, and one show redressing to a GREAT degree). Now the last three shows I worked on have been some of my favorite things I have ever done in my life. Earlier this year I was in a “Devised Immersive Experience” (That alone sounds like a parody of theatre kid talk I know). Called “A Memorial Service For Lily Evergreen” the story revolved around a group of mourners attending a memorial service for a young woman who died under mysterious circumstances. We all wrote the show as a cast, and performed it essentially with no fixed seating. The audience was encouraged to follow us around and be all around the space with us. Each of us were essentially doing on own personal 90 minute play. It rocked!!! It was a very cathartic experience for me and I love and miss that cast so much (Hi Ashley! Hi Stephanie! Hi Trev! Hi Dylan! Hi Jessica! Hi Andy! Hi Dahlia! Hi Rashae! Hi Will again! Hi Shenelle! Hi Ryan! Hi Harper!). The last play I was in was an all male presenting Twelfth Night with Shakespeare Everywhere which was such a blast. I got to be in a skirt, be gay as all hell, it was great. (Hi Eduardo again! Hi Brandon! Hi Rudy! I would say hi to everyone but I fear you would hate me dear reporter). Right now I’m working on a new play called “Roverton” which is a modern take on Our Town with a queer lens. I came up with the idea after playing Simon Stimpson in college and thought “I wish he got a happy ending” now he gets one, more or less.
I’m sure it wasn’t obstacle-free, but would you say the journey has been fairly smooth so far?
As stated in my big overview. I have had major depressive disorder nearly my whole life. This has led to many problems, mainly those involving my headspace. When you have depression, your mind is fundamentally warped. Your self worth is non-existent. So when people are nice to you, your mind distorts it. You don’t believe them, you don’t believe people could actually like you. This is not only an awful and terrible mindset it is also incredibly hard to unlearn. When I got TMS they woke my neurons up sure but now I had the proper emotions, but I didn’t have any of the proper coping skills or mindset. It was easy to fall into old habits, and if I wasn’t careful, I could spiral. Progress is not linear and there is no magic solution to making you better. On some level you have to correct your thinking yourself. Which is really hard! Life is hard, man. I get through it, however, by surrounding myself with as many people as possible and all sorts of people. I love to talk, but I also love to listen. Being heard by another person who is actively listening is more intimate than any love making I have found (and I have found quite a few ways). It also just helps on a statistical level. I find it hard to argue with data, and if I get more people to like me on a statistical level. I suppose I am enjoyable.
Alright, so let’s switch gears a bit and talk business. What should we know about your work?
So I got my BA in theatre which means two things
1) I received a broad education on all aspects of theatre
2) I wasn’t good enough at any of em to get a BFA
Just kidding. I didn’t learn about all aspects of theatre. I jest again. I like to say I am a multi-disciplined artist. I have done everything from acting to set design. My big three disciplines are acting, directing, and playwrighting. I am most known for locally for my work in “A Memorial Service For Lily Evergreen”. In terms of playwrighting my play “The Boy With The Wooden Heart” is published under Next Stage Press.
I am and forever will be most proud of my work in “A Memorial Service For Lily Evergreen”. I put so much of myself into that show. Even in ways I didn’t intend to. There was a section of the show I was by myself. I was outside after storming out during a key moment in the show and I am left alone for a good while. The second weekend, audience members followed me out and stayed with me. I got to talk to them in character and tell them lore no one else got to hear. A crazy story about the process is my fellow actor (Dylan Weand) came up with the idea He and I had an affair of sorts at a party. (Dylans character was at one point dating Lily, my character’s sister. BIG DRAMA). This, on paper, is a normal plot point, but the circumstances actually mirrored something that happened to me in real life to an almost eerie amount. At first, it was really hard to write those scenes, much less perform them. But as the process continued, I got over it. Not because I used theatre as a form of therapy but almost a reverse. It made me realize I was not over this asshole from my past and I finally had to confront why and get over it before performances. It marked not only a major part for any creative (Finally using my trauma as a means to create art. I am kidding. Oh my god, I am kidding) but a major change in growth and mindset for me. I could see an early version of myself not being able to get past this. But this version could.
What sets me apart I think is my willingness to do anything and have fun with it. Whether it is wearing nothing but a pair of briefs (And a killer mustache), doing a reverse strip tease, or having to dance with a metaphorical representation of my sins. Most recently, I did my first film shoot in Tulsa and I got to set and the director handed me a dog mask and said “Now get in the dog cage,” and I was like, “okay”. I also like to think my passion for what I do is palpable. You can tell I like doing it. Even if I’m not the best at what I am doing in that given moment, you can’t say I don’t care. I love art, I love storytelling, I also just love humanity. One time I bought a collection of Chekhov plays from Half Price Books, and a slip of paper fell out. It was a list of books that someone used as a bookmark. I cried. Here was a piece of evidence a human read this book. Tucked between the longing prose was a simple list of things this person needed to buy. Used as a marker of where they stopped reading in “The Cherry Orchard”. Nothing seemed more profound to me.
So maybe we end on discussing what matters most to you and why?
People. Whether that be my friends, my fellow artists, or many who are suffering everywhere in the world. I am not going to say I hope my art heals everything the world is going through but I hope I can offer either catharsis, escapism, or inspiration. If possible all three. When the lights dim after a project, the set cleared away, I always look forward to the words “cast party?” I love the joy of talking to people. Hearing their stories. Where they hope to be. I love just lingering in the space where people are existing. Even If I don’t engage. I just want to exist, to live, to be around people.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: @Metaphoricallyben
