Today we’d like to introduce you to Kilynda Ray.
Kilynda, please share your story with us. How did you get to where you are today?
As a young college student in Los Angeles, CA, I realized that giving back to my community was very important to me. I discovered that understanding the life and mental health of young people was my purpose. I worked in many sectors of mental health, from counseling victims of trauma and abuse, coordinating domestic violence programs, conducting forensic evaluations of incarcerated youth, training therapeutic foster parents to now working full-time at the Dallas Police Department and owning a private family counseling center.
I attended the University of Southern California, majoring in Sociology and minoring in Law and Society. After completing undergraduate studies, I went on to earn a Masters of Marriage and Family Therapy, also from the University of Southern California. I worked for some time in a non-profit agency in southern Los Angeles and decided to move to the east coast to attend Howard University, an Historically Black University in Washington, DC to pursue a Ph.D. in Psychology. As a full-time student, I had to support myself financially and decided to take on a part-time job as a family support worker for a large foster care agency in Northeast DC, I assisted social workers with cases, transported children to appointments, supervised visits between children and their birth parents and helped ensure home visits and court cases went smoothly. Working with foster children and their parents was my most rewarding work and I was fortunate enough to stay with the agency moving up to in-home therapist and eventually foster parent trainer, all while juggling rigorous degree program.
I most enjoyed training parents, which further fueled my desire to become a family therapist. I was able to establish relationships with people in the community of Washington, DC, getting to know their stories and inspiring them to give back to children who need love and a safe home. I always knew helping children and families was my purpose for my work but the work I did in DC solidified my intentions.
Following graduation, I moved back to California and worked in a state prison to earn needed hours for my license. Correctional work was short-lived due to budget cuts and a demanding work environment. I began working at the Department of Veterans Affairs as a psychologist helping Veterans and their families cope with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder after serving their country. I specialized in a unique couple’s treatment, which addressed PTSD and relationship restoration. I also helped develop a parenting program for Veterans.
I continued my work at the VA, supervising other psychology trainees in couples and trauma therapy. I wanted to do more in the general community, particularly the African American community. I started my own private practice in Waxahachie, TX providing individual and couples therapy. My primary focus and vision for my private practice is to assist adolescents with treating depression, anxiety, and relationship concerns.
In my role as a police psychologist with the Dallas Police Department, I am responsible for conducting officer candidate pre-employment evaluations, counseling officers and their families, and developing wellness, resilience and bias trainings. I strive to build better relationships between the community and law enforcement by serving as a mental health consultant, assessing the impact of critical incidents and addressing mental stress among police officers.
For the past two years, I have had the great honor of serving as a founding Board member of the DFW Association of Black Psychologists. Our organization strives to meet the mental health needs of the DFW Black community through support, education and professional development. We provide quarterly mental health trainings and events at the South Dallas Cultural Center and other community locations.
Great, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
I believe the bumps and challenges came with the many moves and the job transitions. I am originally from Oakland, CA and have I lived in about six states since I was 18 years old. Moving around and adjusting to new cities has always been a challenge for me. As an adult, I moved back and forth between the west and east coast about three times because I am a person that does not pass up on opportunities. I am also a spiritual person and when God says move, I moved. I also believe as a mental health professional, you have to find your niche. It is a process to know which area of service is best for you. I think this process took longer for me than most.
I wanted to have as many experiences under my belt as possible but that meant time, money and personal sacrifice. I have been away from my family since I was 18. I thought living in various places would provide me the best opportunities. I do not regret the decision, but it made it hard for me as that physical support was not easily accessible. Working and going to school full-time was also very challenging but obviously doable. I do think I have come a long way and made huge strides in my life. I know I would not change a thing about my personal and professional journey. I was Blessed that my family and friends have supported me, encouraged me and pushed me to be great. I would not be where I am without them. Knowing that I have made my parents proud and that they no longer worry about my well being makes it all worth it.
Please tell us about Healthy Families Counseling Center.
Healthy Families Counseling Center is a private counseling practice focused on rebuilding and strengthening the family structure. I started my career helping families heal and start over after experiencing trauma and abuse. I believe we all endure struggles, whether they be big or small and our family history and dynamics are all different. Particularly, I believe family traumas, whether it be abuse, neglect, parental absence or loss, can be detrimental and these effects can be passed on from generation to generation. I believe in the power of processing our experiences and gaining new perspectives in addition to learning better communication and problem-solving. Healthy Families Counseling Center encourages healing through individual, couples and family counseling either in-person or virtually.
What I am most proud of is being to help people of color increase their access to mental health services as well as increase their comfort with the counseling experience. Seeking mental health is often taboo in African American, Latin American and Asian American communities. What is most important is for potential clients is to see someone that looks like them. This will encourage them to come to therapy and it helps to ease the discomfort with being vulnerable. I am also proud of the number of adolescents who utilize counseling services. It is important to teach young people to communicate their needs and emotions appropriately to their peers and to their families.
Do you look back particularly fondly on any memories from childhood?
My favorite childhood memory is visiting my grandparents on their ranch in Bakersfield, CA. My compassion extends beyond people to animals as well. My grandfather, father and uncles were ranchers and passed down that care for living things to their children. My cousins and I would spend hours running around these many acres of land, hiding in haystacks, chasing newborn chicks and riding horses. Funny thing, the sound of roosters crowing and cows mooing in the morning still warms my soul.
Pricing:
- With no insurance, most sessions range from $100-150 depending on the family income.
Contact Info:
- Website: healthyfamiliescounseling.com
- Phone: 972-921-5490
- Email: drkray@healthyfamiliescounseling.com
Image Credit:
Photos by French Productions
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