We recently had the chance to connect with Kimberly Gist Miller and have shared our conversation below.
Good morning Kimberly , we’re so happy to have you here with us and we’d love to explore your story and how you think about life and legacy and so much more. So let’s start with a question we often ask: What battle are you avoiding?
The battle I’ve historically avoided is self-discipline. For a long time, I told myself a convenient story: “I’m just spontaneous.” While that’s partly true, life has gently—but firmly—shown me that what I was really avoiding was structure, especially around time management.
In recent months, it’s become clear that my lack of self-discipline has been one of the greatest barriers to my next level of success, particularly as I expand my business. What’s interesting is that I have cultivated deep discipline in other areas—how I fuel my body, how I move my body, how I care for my health. That discipline has been completely transformative. A true game changer.
Seeing that contrast made the lesson impossible to ignore.
So now, I’m no longer avoiding the battle of self-discipline. I’m suiting up for it—with compassion, honesty, and a little humility—and reminding myself daily that this isn’t a punishment or a personality change. It’s an act of both devotion and self respect. And there’s real beauty in choosing it.
Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
Hello! I’m Kim—joyfully single, proudly mama to two incredible adult humans, and devoted companion to one very cute Mini Schnauzer who absolutely runs the house. My nest is empty, my life is intentionally simple, and joy is something I curate on purpose (because peace doesn’t just happen—you design it).
I’m the founder of Harmony Counseling Services, LLC and Kimberly Gist Miller Wellness. I’ve been a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist for over 25 years, and I specialize in helping people heal early emotional wounds and design lives rooted in authenticity, ease, and—yes—actual joy.
In 2021, I experienced a major health scare that required invasive surgery. What started as a physical recovery turned into a full life reckoning. That season led me into deep trauma healing work, including EMDR, and eventually into a complete deconstruction—and very intentional reconstruction—of my life. Think fewer autopilot decisions, more truth-telling. I made some radical lifestyle changes, and as I healed, my work as a therapist transformed right along with me. In the wake of the post-2020 collective chaos, one thing became crystal clear: Black women needed—and deserved—something more.
Today, I’m building Kimberly Gist Miller Wellness, a soul-centered wellness brand devoted to supporting brilliant Black women over 40 as they heal, grow, and thrive. This work allows me to expand beyond traditional psychotherapy and create culturally attuned spaces where Black women can exhale, be witnessed, and stop carrying everything by themselves (because we’ve done enough of that).
What makes this work unique is that it serves as an “after-care” ecosystem—designed for women who may have already done therapy and are ready to continue integrating, growing, and becoming.
I’m currently preparing to launch my first wellness offering, The Becoming Space—a 10-week virtual healing container for Black women over 40 who are ready to move beyond survival and live from a place of stillness, wholeness, and joy. Through community connection, embodied rituals, and culturally affirming practices, this experience invites women to soften, heal, and return to their truest Self—one rooted in freedom, authenticity, and ease. No fixing. No hustling. Just becoming.
Amazing, so let’s take a moment to go back in time. Who were you before the world told you who you had to be?
Whew. What a profound question.
A core part of my personal journey has been the slow and intentional deconstruction of early conditioning—from people, systems, and institutions that tried to tell me who I was supposed to be. I say that with deep respect and gratitude for those who loved and supported me, and with reverence for my courageous ancestors whose sacrifices made my life possible.
And still…the truest version of me was never fully allowed to exist in my early life. My own healing journey has allowed me to deeply connect with my truest self.
I have come to know that she is, and always has been, deeply sensitive and profoundly kind. She loves fiercely and without apology. She is strong, honest, and persistent—a force in her own right. She is rooted in her self-worth and embraces what makes her different rather than shrinking it. She is wildly defiant, unintentionally funny, a little quirky, sometimes moody, and yes—occasionally annoying.
She holds both light and dark with equal grace.
Coming home to her hasn’t been about becoming someone new. It’s been about remembering who I was before the world asked me to edit myself. And that remembering has been one of the most liberating acts of my life.
What did suffering teach you that success never could?
Suffering has taught me one enduring lesson—who I am. Over and over again.
My mother used to say, “Keep living.” As a child, I didn’t fully understand what she meant. As an adult, I do. It wasn’t a warning so much as a truth: keep living, and life will hand you its servings of adversity and pain. And it has.
Each time, suffering has introduced me to a more refined version of myself. Not hardened. Not diminished. Just clearer.
It has taught me that I am resourceful, resilient, and capable of surviving what once felt unimaginable. It has shown me that I am divinely protected and deeply loved—even in seasons when it didn’t look that way on the surface.
Success can build confidence. But suffering teaches you who you are when there’s nothing left to prove.
I think our readers would appreciate hearing more about your values and what you think matters in life and career, etc. So our next question is along those lines. Is the public version of you the real you?
I’d like to gently reframe the question before answering: Is the public version of me the complete version of me? And the answer is no.
What I’ve learned—through life and through healing—is that not everyone deserves access to all of me. Full access is reserved for those I trust and love. And just as importantly, not everyone has the capacity to hold all of me.
That isn’t secrecy or inauthenticity—it’s discernment.
The public version of me is real, but she is not the whole story. She’s a chapter, not the entire book. And I’ve made peace with the fact that some people only need to read a few pages.
Thank you so much for all of your openness so far. Maybe we can close with a future oriented question. What do you understand deeply that most people don’t?
What I understand deeply is how profoundly our early childhood experiences shape us—both the beautiful ones and the painful ones. Many people believe that what happened early in life, especially the hurtful parts, no longer has much influence on who they are today. But the emerging science tells a very different story.
Through my work as an EMDR therapist, I’ve seen again and again that unprocessed early experiences don’t simply fade with time. They live in the nervous system. They shape how we respond, relate, protect ourselves, and move through the world—often quietly, often unconsciously. They create patterns.
What feels especially important to me is helping people understand that this isn’t a personal failure or a flaw. It’s biology. It’s survival. And it’s also changeable.
I’m deeply passionate about inviting people into safe, compassionate spaces where this understanding can lead to real inner healing—where insight meets gentleness, and the body finally gets the chance to let go of what it’s been carrying for far too long.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.kimberlygistmiller.com
- Instagram: @curatedjoycollective
- Linkedin: none
- Twitter: none
- Facebook: none
- Yelp: none
- Youtube: @CuratedJoy
- Soundcloud: none
Image Credits
Photos take by Tyson Pough Photography
